Can I call myself a resident vet now?
As a mom of two rambunctious bunnies, there’s a lot I had to learn.
“You have your life, your job, your friends, your family to provide your social interaction per day. Your dog only has YOU. Interact with your dog for more than five minutes per day and maybe your dog will not go out barking every five seconds.”
“If your pet eats your weed stash, let the vet know. They are not going to call the police.”
“Not a vet, but my mom is. One thing that really frustrates her is the myth that neutering a cat will make them fat and lazy. It reduces the amount of calories they need, which means they need less food and/or more exercise to maintain the same weight. Cats generally get less energetic as they get older regardless.”
“I wish people just even had a BASIC understanding of dog or cat body language. The number of videos posted on Reddit of animals in distress and its tagged as ‘oh my little fluffster is so cute when he plays!'”
“If you own a pet and it’s not a bird/mammal, it doesn’t love you, not the way you’re thinking of love. Reptiles, amphibians, and fish don’t produce serotonin the way mammals and some birds do. They really do not care about you, they don’t want to be snuggled, they don’t want to be your friend, and it doesn’t make a difference to them if you feed them/do their maintenance or someone else does.”
“Don’t pet your parrot anywhere but its head, otherwise you are masturbating them. It’s not cute. They look happy because you are wanking them off.”
“The internet is not a place for you to self-diagnose and treat your pet. I saw way too many things happen to pets that didn’t need to. Like putting oregano or oil in your dog’s ear to treat an ear infection.”
“For the love of God, don’t feed your dog table food. One intake of the wrong food can potentially cause pancreatitis.”
“Don’t call the vet’s office to describe your own symptoms in the hope they’ll let you run in and pick up some meds for…the dog.”
“Do not get a cat and then expect me to amputate its toes because you don’t want it scratching the furniture.”
“Your pet is most likely fat and you are the one making them that way. Stop feeding them so damn much, yes even if they beg.”
What facts did you learn from a vet about your pet? Let us know in the comments!
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