Honest Fashion Critiques From Irish On Twitter

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“I was wearing a vintage jacket in a long line for drinks when a lad goes, ‘This is taking forever, your man has been here since the ’80s.’”

Yesterday, I landed on Irish Twitter, and let me tell you something — it’s undefeated. Recently, one user shared a story about trying to look cute while out in Ireland, only to be called Mario after someone spotted her red beret.

Props to anyone who tries to be fashionable in ireland i wore a red beret once in waterford and someone called me super mario


Via Twitter: @janky_jane

The floodgates were then opened, encouraging other rejected fashionistas to tell their own stories of times when they wore outfits they thought were a win, only to be immediately told otherwise. Here are a few of my faves:

1.

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@janky_jane Was wearing a vintage nike jacket in a very long que for drinks at a boxing match when a Belfast lad goes “fuck me this is taking forever, your man has been here since the 80’s”


Twitter: @eoinjoneill / Via Twitter: @eoinjoneill

2.

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@janky_jane I once wore a silver jacket to college, turned up late for class, said ‘sorry I’m late’, lecturer said, ‘that’s ok’ then waited til I was halfway across the front of the full class before following up with ‘trouble with the spaceship again was it?’.


Twitter: @MrWeir / Via Twitter: @MrWeir

3.

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@janky_jane I wore a white, wool turtle-neck jumper to the match once and a fella in the pub said ‘Where have you parked the U-boat?’.


Twitter: @L20_MTN / Via Twitter: @L20_MTN

4.

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@janky_jane I wore a suit with a matching tie and pocket square to my first day of work at an advertising company (I thought I was going to be in Mad Men I guess) and the staff sent around and signed a communion card for me with a fiver in it.


Twitter: @duffles1 / Via Twitter: @duffles1

5.

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@janky_jane Wearing a suit on my way to a job interview, I was stopped and asked what charges I was up on. Also played football with a lad who was called Moses by all his friends cos he wore sandals once when he was 9. Another was called Barney for years after he wore a purple jumper.

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Twitter: @BrianComey / Via Twitter: @BrianComey

6.

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@janky_jane a brick layer I used to work with walked by a sales rep wearing pointy shoes and he asked him “what the fuck are those for, kicking the eyes out of spiders?”


Twitter: @joestodge / Via Twitter: @joestodge

7.

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@janky_jane I once ordered a taxi in Belfast for a night out. The driver pulls up to my house and just says “yer not going out like that. Go back in and change, I’ll turn off the metre.” I swear I was wearing normal jeans and a normal jacket.


Twitter: @AndrewBeatty / Via Twitter: @AndrewBeatty

8.

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@AndrewBeatty @janky_jane I once had an uber driver ask me (wearing a nice pair of jeans and a smartish jumper) where I was off to
“Going on a date”
“You look like you’re an undercover policeman”


Twitter: @comedysavage / Via Twitter: @comedysavage

9.

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@janky_jane My mother wore a fur hat to her aunts funeral in December, she went to sympathise with her cousins to be greeted with “Patricia, how was Moscow?” The rest of the day she was introduced as Our Russian Cousin. At the time they were all in their 60s


Twitter: @LiamPix / Via Twitter: @LiamPix

10.

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@janky_jane Early 90s Omagh, bloke comes into the bar wearing a puffa jacket, 120 notes it cost, everyone is mocking him, barman says ‘not sure why you’re mocking him I’ve one of those at home…’ lad getting mocked “See?” Barman continues ‘aye its round the immersion heater’ uproar


Twitter: @Bogiesalterego / Via Twitter: @Bogiesalterego

12.

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@janky_jane A friend wore a Superman tshirt walking down a street in Navan when a car slowed down and shouted “some Superman you are and you walkin”!!


Twitter: @ChasingGraham / Via Twitter: @ChasingGraham

14.

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@janky_jane Wore a diamanté encrusted canary tight yellow tshirt to the Spirit Store in Dundalk one night about 15 years ago and some lad kept on going “Here he is, Gianni Versace” whenever I’d go to the bar to get a drink


Twitter: @CianByNature / Via Twitter: @CianByNature

15.

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@janky_jane My sister wore a brown leather satchel bag to school one day & she could hear her students saying “Jaysus here’s Indiana Jones” as she walked towards the classroom


Twitter: @sinead_farrelly / Via Twitter: @sinead_farrelly

16.

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@janky_jane Seen someone a wearing black and white striped top being accused of working in footlocker.. so much so people were taking shoes off and then asking your one if they had them in a 10 in the back 🤣


Twitter: @Macker36 / Via Twitter: @Macker36

17.

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Once while bartending I wore cropped slacks. And a patron tipped me a tenner saying “this is so next time you can afford the rest of the pants” https://t.co/KLGakc1NMN


Twitter: @JpeJpeg / Via Twitter: @JpeJpeg

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